Over the Top

Sylvester Stallone is by nature a man of few words. A film that headlines Stallone will rarely contain Oscar quality acting on his part but you’ve got to love the guy anyway. In one of the 1980’s many overlooked B movies, Stallone stars as Lincoln Hawkes, a troubled divorced truck driver who arm wrestles on the side for extra cash. Arm wrestling becomes Hawkes’s ticket to a better life and custody of his son. The whole film is spent following the underdog story of Hawkes and his battle against not only the bigger and stronger Bull Hurley but also against his rich and evil father-in-law. The father –in-law desperately does not want his grandson interacting with Hawkes brainwashing the family that he is a bad influence and a bad father. In the end Stallone rises to the challenge and takes down Hurley in an epic arm wrestling match in Las Vegas that wins him a check to pick up the pieces of his life and at the same time earning the respect of his son. It was a pretty good film for us guys; however, I’m sure the ladies might think differently about it. How can you not like anything that Stallone is in? Come on… the guy is PURE action. Plus Kenny Loggins’s Meet Me Halfway adds to the overall 80’s effect of this film. Go out and rent this one or you could even probably buy it for the same price.

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Memorable Lines:

I don’t think Stallone talks… ever.

Caddy Shack (1980)

This movie is completely without a plot or real character development. That is not to say that it isn’t entertaining and very funny, it just lacks any kind of real substance. The only real plot is development is of the main caddy boy and his girlfriend, which ends up going pretty much nowhere. It is entirely composed of one-dimensional subplots that don’t really seem to resolve themselves or have any substantial connection. In many ways the lack of plot is part of the film’s appeal.

Needless to say, Bill Murray’s character is creepy. He talks to himself (most of the time about things that don’t make sense,) follows around old women, and is obsessed with hunting a gopher. If taken at face value, the movie is very funny and fun to quote, but if you try to look deeper there isn’t much there…not that there is anything wrong with mindless entertainment. It definitely falls into the category of movies that are better the second time you watch them. Much like Anchorman and Zoolander, the first time you watch them they don’t make any sense, but something happens with that second viewing that makes what once seemed to be utter nonsense become brilliantly funny. If you have never seen it, I suggest watching it and waiting a week or so and watching it again. Its much better the second time.

See the Trailer here: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0080487/

The King of Comedy 1982

"Everyone's mom was a big influence on them growing up. If my mom were here today, I'd say, "Mom--what are you doing here? You've been dead for seven years!" --The best joke of Rupert Pupkin in The King of Comedy

Leave it to Hollywood to create a film where fans go ga-ga over famous performers, and the average man can't make it in the biz. Rupert Pupkin, Robert De Niro's character, just wants to be a rich and famous TV star, like his idol, Jerry Langford, played by Jerry Lewis.

Rupert has to sneak his way into Jerry's car after the taping of a late night talk show to try and get an in in Hollywood. Jerry comes off as sick of his fans and their constant adoration, and Rupert wants to use him as a step on the ladder towards fame and fortune.

But, unfortunatly for Rupert, his stand-up act stinks. After repeated attempts to get through Jerry's office and grab a spot on his late night talk show, Rupert becomes a kidnapper and finally gets his act across the air. The problem is, the only funny joke is the one I quoted above (which could use some re-working).

Rupert's cohort in bad stand-up is Sandra Berhard, in perhaps the role which best depicts her whole career--a floundering wannabe. Problem is, Martin Scorsese's otherwise good film demeans the average underdog, and praises the Hollywood hero.

If you're looking for a side-splitting comedy, like the title would suggest, this ain't it. But, if you want a study of a delusional untalented comedian who performs to cardboard cutouts in his mother's basement, than this is it.

Wikipedia
Bad Jokes

Princeton could use a guy like Joel?

"Sometimes you just have to say.. 'What the fuck?'"


Risky Business is a classic of the 80's decade that crafts a teenage hero for every kid feeling the pressure of grades, parents and their futures. Joel, played by Tom Cruise desperately wants the grades and SAT scores that will qualify him for Princeton University. His parents seem to be the only people that want that even more than Joel.

Mr. and Mrs. Goodsen have high expectations for their son, and they both run a very strict household. The scene in which both parents give him an endless briefing before Joel will be home alone for a few days reveals interesting camerawork. The camera points directly at his parents for a the duration of the scene. They give the details to the audience; it is as if the viewers get a first person perspective of Joel as his parents babble on. It further emphasizes the demand for Joel to be a responsible teenager. A relationship with the audience is established, and many teenagers can relate to Joel's situation.

The next few scenes show his relief upon his parents' departure. Joel is ecstatic, but does not do anything too rebellious. He dances around in his underwear to the tunes played on his fathers stereo and drinks whiskey with a TV dinner.

His friend convinces Joel to order a prostitute with the famous line, "so your folks are goin' outta town for a few days.. what the fuck? This friend is going to Harvard in the fall. At first, he calls the prostitute for Joel, who is extremely reluctant. The prostitute arrives and he is a large man in a dress. This prostitute gives him a number for a girl that "all the white boys on the lake want." He later calls this number, introducing himself as Ralph.

This film is so hilarious because of the character and the situation he gets himself into. He is in every way a "good kid," perhaps raised with such restrictions causing a desire to do anything rebellious and fun (he is easily influenced by piers.) Leave it to Joel to make one mistake that puts his entire future in jeopardy. He orders a prostitute, who is reluctant to leave the next morning. He is then robbed. Joel must search for her with his friend, and he is chased by "Guido, the killer pimp" soon after finding her. So many other problems occur when his parents are away. He is goated into taking out his father's Porsche, which rolls into Lake Michigan later in the evening. He misses his finals which drastically bring down his grade point average. And he has an interview with the dean of Princeton during his whorehouse fundraiser to replace the Porsche. The interview is so embarrassing and awkward, Joel shouts, "looks like the University of Illinois!" after the dean leaves.

Joel is transformed from the straight-laced adult his parents want him to be to the confident improviser that his future depends on. His grades and SAT scores are no where near Princeton's range, but Joel's radical ways lead to his acceptance into the University. It proves that taking risks and being wild can work to one's advantage, at least in Joel's case. This notion also defines the hero of the 80's teen. The entire theme is reproduced in "The Girl Next Door" (2004.)

This is Spinal Tap

What an unbelievably brilliant movie. I mean, I have heard of its majesty, but I never could have predicted how truly fabulous it is.

This is Spinal Tap is a satire of a documentary--I'm sorry, a "rockumentary"--about Britain's loudest band, Spinal Tap. Michael McKean as David St. Hubbins leads the band as he and his band mates live and tell their story in front of the camera of filmmaker Marty DiBergi, played by everyone's favorite meat head, Rob Reiner.

The satire is brilliant. What's truly amazing about it is how not far off it is from the way a washed up rock band probably is. They think they're still someone. They think someone still cares. So they act like they're the greatest thing ever and act like jerks trying to get people to do things for them, but nobody actually cares. The ego, the girlfriend that breaks up the band, the fight with the manager, the failed publicity attempts, the many changes in images, the bold album covers. It could absolutely be mistaken for real, even though it is on the floor hilarious.

My favorite parts are the scenes where DiBergi is talking to Nigel, played by Christopher Guest. The discussions are stated so matter-of-factly, but what they're talking about is completely ridiculous. I have a great appreciation for both satire and nonsequiter humor, and these scenes embody those types of humor perfectly.

I've never seen a movie like this before. There are very few that fit into the genre of the fake documentary, other than, perhaps, The Blair Witch Project. It's both intellectually amazing and outstandingly funny. Who could ask for more in a film?

"These amps go to 11," baby!

Trading Places 1983

Starring:

Eddie Murphy

Dan Aykroyd

Jamie Lee Curtis

Trading Places, starring some of the most talented actors of our time is quite possibly one of the funniest comedies of the 1980's. This movie shows the discrepancy between the rich and the poor in a comical way. Winthorp, who is played by Dan Aykroyd, is a Wall Street tycoon who happens to cross paths with Valentine who is poor street hustler played by Eddie Murphy.

Two wealthy power players (Duke and Duke) make a bet that they can turn Valentine into a prime time broker by pinning a crime within the company onto Winthorp. This in turn puts Winthorp out of work, money, a house and his girlfriend. Winthorp is forced to live with a prostitute who later on in the film helps to prove his innocence. All the while, Valentine is living the lap of luxury in Winthorps former home.

Through much of the confusion between the sudden life changes, Valentine and Winthorp cross paths and confront each other on the issue at hand. Togehter, they agree that they have been set up by the Duke brothers and must get even!!! They do this by letting the Duke brother's stock of frozen orange run right into the ground. Both Valentine and Winthorp get away free with their own stash of money and are relieved that the Duke brothers lose millions of dollars. More importantly, Winthorp gets Jamie Lee Curtis!!

The Princess Bride is possibly the greatest movie of all time. No, it is the greatest movie of all time. It is the only film that can successfully combine action, comedy, romance, and wit. As the grandfather so cleverly puts it, “Are you kidding? Fencing, fighting, torture, revenge, giants, monsters, chases, escapes, true love, miracles...” I don’t even know where to begin to talk about this movie. Every moment of this movie and every word is perfectly placed. Every time I watch it I discover another wonderful line, or something I never realized before. It is the kind of movie that you watch over and over and it never gets old. It has been somewhat of a comfort movie for me.
The Princess Bride was adapted from the novel by William Goldman. This was on my mind this past time I watched it because I’m currently taking a film adaptations class. The novel is mainly centered around the grandson as an adult who went back to read the novel again, only to realize that the grandfather had drastically changed the story. In reality, the book that was read to him was mainly a historical document of the country of Gilder with the romance story just thrown in there. In the movie, however, this is never addressed. They are both charming in their own ways, and I strongly suggest both watching the movie and reading the book.

Quotable quotes:
“Life is pain, highness, anyone who tells you differently is selling something.”

“Inconceivable!”
“You keep using that word. I don’t think it means what you think it means.”

Grandfather: “When I was your age, television was called books.”

“We are men of action, lies do not become us”

“We’ll never survive”
“Nonsense. You’re only saying that because nobody ever has.”

Henry V

Okay, chitlins, sit back, relax, and brace yourself because Kenneth Branaugh is about to give you a history lesson with an armored boot to the face!

Wait...I'm getting ahead of myself...

For those of you who don't know, Kenneth Branaugh is one of the many members of The Royal Shakespear Company. That means when it comes to reciting iambic pentameter, he's one of the best. And in 1989 he decided he was going to take his knowledge of Shakespeare and combine it with his knowledge of film to create this guy:


Nevermind that he looks like a Medieval warrior with Down Syndrome...apparently that's just how british royalty cut their hair. Besides, what's more important is what he has to say: "Once more unto the breach dear friends, once more; Or close the wall up with our English dead!" Yeah, I know what your thinking: "Where's the nearest blunt object? I gotta go kill some Frenchmen!" Me too! But calm down, it's just a movie. Anyways, that battle was over 500 years ago.

...Dissapointing, no?


But I digress. Even if you're unfamiliar with the language of Shakespeare, its a very enjoyable movie! Branaugh has a brilliant cast of talented actors. Including, but not limited to:

Judi Dench as Mistress Quickley
Christian Bale as Fallstaff's Boy
And featuring Bilbo Baggins as Captain Fluellen

The actors do great justice to a play 500 years in the making (and yes, even as a child Christian Bale had that scowl on his face).

Heartbreak Ridge 1986

"Why don't I bend you over the table there ... send you home with the "I just pumped the neighbor's cat" look on your face" --Tom Highway (Clint Eastwood)

Maybe you all haven't heard of Heartbreak Ridge before, but it's one of those gems found on VHS at the Winter Park Library that hisses while you watch it. I don't know why I was the only one laughing in the room while Clint Eastwood kicked all kinds of ass and spat out quotable dialogue galore. Whose ass did he kick, you ask? Well, in the sunset of his character, Tom Highway's career as a marine, he whooped up on dirty hippies, liberal college nerds, paper-pushin 'play-by-the-rules' generals, bitches, bikers, riff-raff, and, in the final conflict, West Indians sporting Russian-bought AK-47's.

Highway whips his platoon into shape by teaching them how to improvise like marines of old. He plays by nobody's rules, and calls out orders in a scratchy, old western voice as if he was a three pack a day smoker since the age of six. In his fighting experience, Highways considers his record to stand at 0-1-1. No wins, a loss in Viet Nam, and a tie in Korea. But, after the 1983 invasion of Grenada, Highway records a victory.

Dr. Boles would have a field day putting a queer theory spin on this movie. The lives of the marines seem to revolve around group discussions in the shower, slapping each others chests, and siging along with the long haired, makeup wearing, ear-pierced, flashy dressing, rock star turned marine named Stitch Jones, played by Mario Van Peebles. There's even a mud wrestling scene in the middle of the movie to decide which platoon reigns supreme. But, all this girliness only adds to the manliness of Clint Eastwood, who kicks major ass in Heartbreak Ridge.

http://www.clinteastwood.net/welcome.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heartbreak_Ridge

Risky Business

"I don't believe this...I got a Trig test tomorrow and I'm being chased by Guido, the killer pimp."

Joel Goodsen, who is played by the sexy and young Tom Cruise, is a studious and naiive college-bound freshman. He is known by his friends as being the shy and boring guy who never lives his life to the fullest. Through much persuasion and the allure of a liberated call girl named Lana, Joel decides to party it up! Joel's parents are away for the weekend and he decides to incorporate his friend's motto of "Fuck it!" into his life and put it to "good" use. Unfortunately, Joel is confronted with Lana's insincerity and more importantly her ex-pimp who wants to CRUSH him for the loss of business. Joel is forced to make the decision of choosing between Lana, whom he now has feelings for, and the job of getting his house put back together before his parents come home. Joel, with a lot of help from Lana and her call girl friends is able to host a party and earn some fast cash. His risky business redeems itself and he is able to have the house together by dinner time!!

"All you need to say is 'What the Fuck!'"

This movie is one of the best Cruise films probably because it was one of his films that he made before he went insane. Not only is it funny, but it is also somewhat suspenseful. I am ashamed to say that it was only my first time seeing it, but I highly recommend it to anyone looking for an entertaining and risqu'e Tom Cruise flick!!!